Who stood up for Jeremiah?
When the Times published an editorial Monday calling for school leaders to open their eyes to the intolerance and meanness on their campuses before another tormented teenager was driven to suicide, no one on the editorial board could have imagined how quickly and tragically predictive those words would become.
That same day, 14-year-old Jeremiah Lasater shot and killed himself at his high school in Acton, a small community on the outer reaches of Los Angeles County. The school quickly rolled out the grief counselors. But where were the counselors for the kind of grief that Jeremiah suffered every day? As a big, gawky kid with a learning disability, Jeremiah had endured daily and daylong taunts, both at Vasquez High and his previous school.
According to people who knew Jeremiah, when he tried to fight back, he was suspended. So he stopped fighting. Teachers, students and some parents describe the schools that Jeremiah attended as places where he and other kids seen as misfits not only were the targets of teasing, but of thrown food and rocks as well. There's no indication, though the information might simply be missing from the news reports, that anyone stood up for Jeremiah.
Somehow, it's not surprising that school leaders disavowed any knowledge of such problems, even though Vasquez High has only about 600 students; no one, they said, reported such problems to them. A passive approach toward nasty behavior doesn't work; it requires actively changing the school culture, and reinforcing the messsage every day, so that meanness isn't tolerated by teachers, administrators or other students.
Vasquez High will probably undergo those kinds of changes now. But who is going to stand up for the other Jeremiahs at schools that have not had a mirror held up to the ugliness on campus?
Jeremiah was an amazing boy. He went through rough times, and the people who should have stood up for him i.e- His football coach, didn't. It is disheartening to have lost him. For the people who really knew Jeremiah, he was such an amazing friend. I'll miss you always Jeremiah, you are forever in my Prayers. <3
Posted by: C. Smith | October 31, 2008 at 09:16 AM
My child was in the same Special Day Class as Jeremiah last year at High Desert Junior High School. My child is described exactly as Jeremiah is, big for his age, gentle, and sweet. My child experienced the same teasing, bullying, and miserable experience at school. Bullying was one of the main reasons I moved from the district. When I heard what happened I burst into tears, thinking that could have been my child. Every student, parent, and teacher in the community needs to take responsibility to make changes and make a difference. The District needs to implement a Safe School Ambassadors program in which the students are empowered to speak up against their peers. The students are the first to see and hear the what goes on. They have the ability to make our schools safer, they just need the tools to do so. It does not do any good to have In Service discussions for staff about bullying, when the the Administration does not back the teachers up when they report it. The Acton-Agua Dulce School District needs to allow parents to be present on all campuses, especially at breaks and recesses. The more adults present, the safer the schoools will be for all! The entire community needs to come together and demand the District make these changes. It is tragic that Jeremiah took his life. It is equally as tragic if we,individually and as a community, do not address how we treat others on a daily basis. You can state there is 0 tolerance all you want! Jeremiah was compelled to take action, and this was because we did not. I mourn the loss of Jeremiah as I would my own son, because if I had not taken action, this could have been my child. Teach our children about tolerance, and love, and courage. Lead by example! Make changes happen not just discuss them. Each and every one of us needs to take responsibility for what happened and responsibility to ensure that there is 0 tolerance for bullying, teasing, or putting other people down, not just at school but in every day life! For life is what Jeremiah couldn't bare anymore, and life is what he took.
Posted by: Angela Toghia | October 21, 2008 at 09:38 PM
Posted by: Angela | October 25, 2008 at 10:59 AM
I am an Acton resident who has 5 children in Acton's school system. I was outraged when I found out about Jeremiah. That poor child had been bullied ever since 7th grade that I know of. I myself stepped in when my daughter stood up for him in front of the middle school last year. The same 2 boys bullied him on a daily basis; you can not tell me nobody knew.
I know there were other kids who stood up for Jeremiah as well. My youngest daughter went to the principal, on more than one occasion when they were in middle school, and nothing was ever done. I was called to school because my daughter got into a fight standing up for Jeremiah. Why is it the ones that tried to help were getting in trouble, and the bullies got away with it? This I just don’t understand.
I have been dealing with the bullying since my oldest child started Vasquez in 2003. My oldest child was bullied on numerous occasions. The school was informed on what was happening and nothing was ever done. My oldest child endured 4 years of bullying at Vasquez, because once you are a target the torment never stops. Once you go to the school officials who are there to help and protect you, you are tormented more. Why is this?
Now my younger children are making their way to Vasquez, and I am afraid of what they are going to have to endure. My youngest daughter has already been bullied in middle school for being a friend to Jeremiah. She is now considered an outcast. When will it end? When is the School District going to take action for this on going problem? I want answers before I have other children go through Vasquez.
I want people to be held accountable for these actions. How long are these bullies going to be able to get away with all this meanness?
Posted by: Regina Hernandez | October 25, 2008 at 10:36 AM
So tragic that special needs children like Jeremiah get no needs met and are further tormented by those who are supposedly "normal" kids with "normal" parents. Disgusting.
The school does not even have the decency to name the him in their "incident" report and simply says "We all mourn when there is a loss of life in our community and we offer our sincere and heartfelt condolences to the student's family, friends, and classmates"
http://aadusd.k12.ca.us/PDF/Vasquez%20high%20school%20incident.pdf
.. to "the students" family... how about using a name, how about making it personal. Until it gets personal, I guess it just doesn't count and unfortunately that is the message that the governing body of this school is sending to it's students and parents.
Jeremiah's death is tragic and shameful to those who stood by and did nothing. It is so sad that this happened. So sad that a boy was pushed to such a level that he found no other way out. and so sad for his family who surely loved him so. What a tragic story.
The officials at this school should be replaced by others who can carry out the duties and responsibilities to ensure that no child should suffer so, and by those who will compassionately carry out their mission statement:
"... to provide a safe and secure environment where students, through quality programs that recognize their individual needs, can obtain skills and knowledge necessary to meet a challenging future. Students will be encouraged to develop an appreciation for learning as a life-long process and to realize their responsibilities to each other as well as the larger community."
Posted by: suzanne | October 23, 2008 at 11:43 PM
Thank you to all of you posting here who are pouring out your love to Jeremiah and his family and are as outraged as I am. It makes me feel just a little better about the rest of the human race.
Posted by: John Caulfield | October 23, 2008 at 06:23 PM
As Jeremiah's 8th grade teacher, I only wish that there was more that I could have done. The school district moved me on one day's notice to the High School despite solid evaluations. They have never offered an official reason for this. I have as Jerry Watkins (Principal at High Desert) said, my own opinion as to why. I became a political liability for being a tireless advocate for the needs of the special education students under my charge, and their parents. For more information please see the Signal article dated October 22.
Posted by: Michael Daly | October 23, 2008 at 01:32 PM
So - what's being done about this piece of garbage who threw chili on this kid? At minimum, he should be prosecuted (as an adult) for assault and expelled from school. Then lets watch the liberals come out of the woodwork to say we are being to harsh on this "child". Until this sort of crime is treated as a crime - we will continue to see these kinds of tragedies.
Posted by: Dave Blaker | October 23, 2008 at 11:19 AM
I too am a Acton resident and my daughter goes to Vasquez.
I was at the candle light vigil on that evening of the day we will never forget. I was angered and outraged at all the tears and support. Where was the support when Jeremiah needed it? It is sad that a tragedy brings everyone together in a show of love and support but lets not let it happen again. Children of vasquez...take a child under your wing and take care of them. Don't knock them down. Be kind to eachother. If you see someone alone, smile at them and say Hi. Imagine if you had to walk a day in Jeremiahs shoes.
I hope this has opened the eyes of the students at Vasquez that this kind of behavior is uncalled for. It is now too late but I hope that it changes the problems that this school has overlooked so that it never happens again.
I am heartbroken for Jeremiah and his family. No mother or father should ever bury their child. God bless them and God be with them.
Posted by: Melissa | October 23, 2008 at 08:36 AM
BULLYING IS HARASSMENT AND HARASSMENT IS A CRIME. UNTIL IT IS TREATED AS THE CRIME IT IS NOTHING WILL CHANGE. TAKE IT FROM EXPERIENCE THE MORE THE VICTIM COMPLAINS THE MORE THEY GET THE BLAME!! I DON'T BELIEVE FOR ONE MINUTE THAT NO ONE IN ADMINISTRATION WAS UNAWARE OF WHAT WAS GOING ON. CHILDREN TALK.....THEY GOSSIP...... THERE IS NO WAY SOMEONE DIDN'T HEAR ANYTHING. IF YOU BELIEVE THAT I GOT A BRIDGE I WANT TO SELL YOU!! THE PARENTS OF THE BULLY NEED TO BE HELD RESPONSIBLE AS WELL FOR THEY ARE THE ONES WHO CREATED THEM!!!
IT IS TRAGIC WHAT HAPPEN TO THIS YOUNG BOY MY HEART GOES OUT TO HIS FAMILY. TO THINK HOW DESPERATE THIS YOUNG BOY WAS THAT SUICIDE WAS HIS ONLY OPTION. THIS SHOULD NEVER HAVE HAPPENED AND IT IS ABOUT TIME THAT SOMETHING BE DONE ABOUT "BULLYING"
Posted by: STACEY | October 23, 2008 at 07:14 AM
On Monday, October 20, 2008 a tragedy occurred at Vasquez High that never, never should have happened.
10-22-08 The saddest part about Jeremiah's death is that everyone is "pretending" that "no-one" knew there was an issue. That is such b/s. Superintendent Stan Halperin claims he knew Jeremiah since middle-school? And he didn't know there was an issue?
Come now. Fact is: Anyone who knew,,, or knew of Jeremiah "knew" that he was teased and harassed on a daily basis. Jeremiah did have some problems,, which is why he was in special education classes, but, in no way did he deserve the harassment that went on, or was condoned.....
Some kids did stand up for him, but there were some kids who were relentless in their harassment. The one particular kid who dumped chili on Jeremiah just prior to him killing himself is the very same kid who used to harass another boy who also attends the same schools several years back. That boy finally stood up to him and put an end to the harassment.
I have to wonder just how many days did Jeremiah bring that gun to school and think about doing what he did.
I am very heartbroken for Jeremiah, his sweet brother Nathan and the family.
Anyway, I hope I didn't offend anyone, as I did not mean to do that,, but this whole situation did not have to happen.
Sincerely, An Acton Parent and Resident
Posted by: Charles Brink | October 22, 2008 at 10:55 PM
There was no safety net for me. My unpardonable sin that allowed all the kids to bully me? I'm a short guy. That's all. Just short. I'm above average in intelligence, have gotten two degrees, and I'm still fighting the prejudice. When I go to a job interview, the interviewer looks me up and down, and tells me I'm "overqualified." (read, you're short and we won't hire you). This kind of exclusionary, bully attitude persists, believe me, well into adulthood. Unless these kids are taught that ALL PEOPLE ARE EQUAL, and that ALL PEOPLE ARE TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT, then these insecure bullies will continue to pick on those they think of as vulnerable. I compared notes with a person who was unusually tall, 6' tall in the sixth grade, and he experienced the exact same thing. It wasn't that I was too short, or he was too tall, it's that we were both "different" than the "perceived norm," as presented by hollywood. Not everyone can look like Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt. Get over it. We should be basing our assessment of people, not on what they look like, but on their character, and on what they accomplish. Remember, Bill Gates was a nerd. Look at him now!
Posted by: Carl C | October 22, 2008 at 08:06 PM
Dear Times editorial board,
Don’t let the tragic death of Jeremiah Lasater cause you to have a negative reaction toward the establishment of special schools for vulnerable youth.
Just bear in mind, please, that there are always alternatives to public policy crises that we may not recognize immediately. Perhaps there is a way to create safe schools for all vulnerable kids, regardless of specified labels, who have no stake whatsoever in being a part of the social jungle of the American high school. Maybe that’s why the Chicago officials are calling these alternative schools “gay friendly” as opposed to GLBT schools outright. It makes sense to me.
Furthermore, the more such alternative, compassion-based schools — heck, call them whatever the kids want — become standard operating procedure in American life, the more any stigma will fade away, and parents just might actually help their kids get into these schools, in addition to the youngsters who take the initiative on their own.
More does need to be done to create civil and respectful environments for all students in the nation. But these kids’ lives are happening in real time, not according to adult standards of social progress. Yes, things have improved overall for gays and lesbians in the last ten years, but these kids experience this agony, sometimes related to sexual orientation and other times not, much more acutely and on a daily basis.
It is morally wrong, simply put, for state governments to compel human beings, including youngsters, to be forced into environments on a daily basis where their humanity is denied, or otherwise be declared truants — outlaws. That’s tyranny. It is a tyranny that fades away with aging, but for those vulnerable kids, like Jeremiah, it is tyranny nonetheless.
The L.A. Times editorial board is right that we must do more, all across this nation, to create more civilized school environments. In the meantime however, real kids are having real lives, and having to experience pure agony on a daily basis — de facto persecution from those who comprise their very world, even though we as adults are in a position to label it, from a distance, as “not fitting in.”
Bullshit. It’s hate, it’s real, and when forced by the law to undergo it each day, it’s a living hell.
I would urge the Times editorialists to continue to do all you can to force school districts to adopt more humane policies on bullying. It’s a must.
But so is the immediate safety, physically and psychologically, of those children who simply do not have enough years of life on this Earth to know that there is a better tomorrow.
They need relief, and they need to have it provided with dispatch, not according to our own aspirations as grown adults for a better society.
Please continue to explore how we might as a country explore as many alternatives as possible to ensure that these vulnerable youngsters — regardless of their own identity processes — have options at their disposal other than being forced into a mammoth bureaucratic structure that negates their very humanity — and the urgency with which that humanity must be validated, and protected.
We must refuse to give in to accepting concrete blocks of human dysfunction when alternatives can be found. We must maintain our aspirations for a better society, but our hopes will never erase human realities. Our hopes are no elixir for Jeremiah’s, and so many other kids, physical and emotional torment.
Timothy Rieger
Posted by: Timothy Rieger | October 22, 2008 at 04:41 PM