Comedian Andy Borowitz runs down summertime news, from lost and found attractive white women to shark attacks. Columnist Patt Morrison wants a rating system for political scandals. USC's John G. Matsusaka wonders where California's money goes, and columnist Rosa Brooks diagnoses DC with ADD:

...Iraq started getting boring too, so now McCain has turned his restless attention back to Afghanistan -- maybe because Barack Obama keeps hammering away at the issue. (Obama, who's been fairly consistent on Afghanistan for six years now, is either the rare politician who doesn't suffer from ADD, or he's smart enough to take his meds.) On Tuesday, McCain released a "comprehensive strategy for victory in Afghanistan." Previous claims of success were forgotten. "The status quo is unacceptable," McCain's campaign declared, but "McCain will turn around the war."

Right! Until we move on to the next country!

The editorial board says a recent legal case demonstrates how little we know about the Rampart scandal, and how it's still costing us money. The board also praises the state for figuring out a better way to count high school dropouts, and is thankful the SEC is finally stepping in to the economic mire, even if it could do more.

On the letters page, readers discuss the New Yorker cover. Councilman Bernard C. Parks writes, "A turban and an Afro today may be a watermelon and a piece of fried chicken tomorrow."

*Cartoon by Joel Pett, Lexington Herald-Leader